Chocolat

We discovered a really nice cafe at the Mall of Asia called Chocolat. From their glass window, you can see on display samples of their delicious-looking cakes. It was more than enough to entice us to walk in and try them out! We ordered their Deep Dark Chocolate and Choco Hazelnut Cake. The cakes' sweetness were just right, not the kind that makes you dizzy after just one bite (that sounded like a rhyme...hehe). Plus the chocolate glazing on top is to die for! We also ordered coffee to go with it. I had the hot mocha which I think they used tablea for the choco flavor. Since I was a big fan of cocoa, I loved the rich chocolatey taste of my cofee. Ahh, heaven! The perfect dessert to cap off the perfect evening with good friends. *smiles*

Noemi, Tricia and I with our yummy cakes!

Still at Chocolat with Miel and Tricia
Extremely high levels of sugar = Laugh trip for the duration of the night (hehe)

Missing Mom

It has been three weeks since my mom left the country to work abroad and now, the house feels a lot emptier without her.

If I had my way, I would have preferred that my mom stayed here in the Philippines. I know that inspite of our financial struggles, she was happy here. She loved her job and her colleagues, she enjoys after-office drinks with her friends and more importantly, her family is here and this is her home.

And aside from missing her presence around the house, it doesn't help that the country she's working in right now is not the safest place in the world. Hay!

But I have faith that God is looking out for her. His presence have always been felt by our family and I have no doubt that He will continue to be there for us.

I terribly, terribly miss my mom. I miss riding to work with her and her endless stories in the morning. Kahit na antok na antok pa ko and all I can do is nod and grunt. Haha. I miss hanging out with her on Sundays, eating Eaji and drinking Coke after hearing mass. I miss watching The Buzz with her as we listen to the latest showbiz stories or just simply marvel at Kris' clothes and pa-sosyal antics (but we love Kris anyway). I miss the gourmet sandwiches that she makes for my baon. I think even Baron, our Japanese spitz, misses his morning walks with my mom during weekends. I just miss every little thing about her.

But I know she went through with this for me, Arvin and Lola. Being a single parent isn't easy and she had to make sacrifices. And with that, I am very proud of her.

Friday Triple Celebration

Two Fridays ago, we celebrated three wonderful occasions - Jerome's passing the boards, Tricia's birthday and Dada's birthday. We had dinner at Aling Tonya's at Dampa, Macapagal and feasted on Chili Garlic Shrimp, Baked Tahong, Ginataang Hipon, Crabs, Lato (seaweeds), and steamed oysters. Yum, yum! After that, off we went to Music Match for 3 hours of glorious KTV bonding!

I love this picture! I look genuinely happy. :)

Binondo, Here We Come!

I learned about the Big Binondo Food Wok as I was browsing through hopeful realist’s blog. As she recounted the places they went to and the food that they ate, I knew that I just had to go there and try it out for myself!

Sparked by curiosity, I googled about it and found out that the Big Binondo Food Wok is a tour conducted by a group known as Old Manila Walks. In their website, they describe themselves as a bunch of “passionate, obsessive and saucy ‘street walkers’(!) determined to walk and talk about one thing: the history, the culture and the heritage plus everything over, under, outside, inside this city of our affections - Manila.”

Aside from going around Chinatown, they also do tours of Intramuros, San Miguel(where the Malacanang is), Chinese Cemetery and the Far Eastern University.

Since I was so excited to go on this walk, my office mates and I contacted Old Manila Walks right away and booked our reservations for Sept. 8. In the meantime, I would just have to satisfy myself with these pictures courtesy of Market Manila.

I can't wait to nibble my way around Chinatown . . .

and try this delicious-looking fried-rice...

and have a bite of this amazing lumpia stuffed to gills with vegetables, seaweed, noodles, etc.

and sample this famed Binondo dumplings...


visit a tablea factory...

and lastly, taste this Taiwanese cold noodles with vegetables and peanut/sesame sauce.

Ahhh, heaven! Will post as soon as I try this sumptuous food for myself!

Of Pseudo-Relationships, Flings and Mutual Understandings

My friend, who is going through a pseudo-relationship at the moment, gave this very interesting article to me. I have been through these kind of relationships during a few points in my life. The uncertainty of things is fun and exciting. But at the end of the day, you begin to wonder - how long is this going to last? May gusto ba talaga siya sakin or is he just being nice? Am I investing too much on this? Am I assuming and reading too much between the lines? And the endless barrage of questions and stream of thoughts come pouring in, leaving you depressed and longing for that flicker of hope that things are going to happen the way you want them to be.

So for those who are going through this "parang kayo, pero hindi" stage, may find this article very fitting. And for those who are fortunate enough to have not gone through this, read on and you might learn a thing or two. :)

P.S. I still believe there are pseudo-relationships that can evolve into more serious and committed ones. Just the idealist in me talking. Hehe.

*********************

She is a 24-year old copywriter. He is an architect. They met and
became lovers in college. They broke up last year but remained to be
"friends."

They send sweet text messages and he calls her often to make sure she's okay. They still date. They still have sex. They don't see anyone else. It is obvious that they still love each other but when asked about their situation, she doesn't know the real score. Even her friends are in the dark. "Parang sila, pero hindi."

She works in a telecom. He is reviewing for the board. They are in the same barkada. They talk on the phone till 4 am. He gives her chocolates, flowers and CDs even when there is no occasion. Their friends are suspecting something. Bakit sila nagsosolo kapag may overnight inuman? Why does he hold her close on the dance floor? Bakit sila magkaholding hands lagi? Sila kaya? "He hasn't admitted anything," she rants. "But I let him hug and kiss me.Parang kami, pero hindi."

They work together in an ad agency. After office, they would watch movie, have dinner and stroll at Glorietta. She gave him Harry Potter books for his birthday in exchange for posing as her boyfriend to make an ex jealous. They made out during the company outing in Subic and never talked about it. He said "I love you" once but she wasn't sure if she heard him correctly because they were both drunk then. But one thing she is sure of is her feelings for him. She likes him. And she's assuming that with what he's doing to her and with her, he likes her, too. There's just one hitch:
he has a girlfriend!

She is a 28-year-old virgin. He's a 35-year-old bachelor. Both mountaineers, they became close during their climbs. After a few dates in posh restaurants, he brings her to his condo where they would make out. They have been doing this for months. She wants to believe that "sila na" but then she's not really sure about it. "We don't talk about it but it doesn't really matter," she'd tell her friends. "What's important is I am enjoying this -- whatever it is."

The "parang kayo, pero hindi" stage. Others call it MU or mutual understanding. Pseudo-relationships. Pseudo-boyfriends. Flings. Almost like a relationship, but not quite. It is a phase where the persons involved are more than friends, but not quite lovers. Puwedeng may verbal agreement, puwedeng wala. One or both of you may have admitted your feelings, possible ding hindi. You just let your gestures do the talking for you. Walang pormal na ligawan na nangyari. Hindi kayo mag-dyowa. Pero sa
kilos niyo, sa mga sinasabi niyo, parang kayo, pero hindi.

This kind of "relationship" can happen at different stages for different reasons. It can happen after a break-up. You still love each other, and you want to be with each other but you broke up for a reason. And for reasons that you alone know, ayaw niyo na muna magkabalikan. It can also happen before a relationship, iyong pareho kayong nakikiramdam. Possible din na ayaw niyo munang mag-seryoso kaya kunwa-kunwarian lang
muna. Testing lang.

Puwede ring hindi puwedeng maging kayo kasi isa sa inyo --usually the guy --may ka-relasyon na. Kaya habang hindi pa siya nakikipag-break doon sa girl (sabi niya makikipag-break siya soon pero di naman niya ginagawa), wala muna kayong relasyon para nga naman hindi siya nangagaliwa kasi "hindi naman kayo."

This pseudo-relationship stage, for a time, can be fun. Lalo na kung naghahanap ka lang naman ng "kalaro."

Pero huwag ka lang mag-e-expect na may patutunguhan kayo kasi wala talagang kasiguraduhan.

So bakit ang daming nagse-settle sa ganitong set up ganoong hindi naman sigurado kung may patutunguhan?

Iba't ibang dahilan. Puwedeng for fun lang. Puwedeng "buti na iyan kesa wala" or puwede na iyang "pantawid-gutom." Meaning, habang wala pa iyong the real thing, doon muna sa kunwa-kunwarian.

For those who are not in a serious relationship, they would think that pseudo-relationship is better than no relationship at all. It would be fun, if all you are after for is that "kilig" feeling.

Aminado naman ako na once upon a time, may mga pseudo-relationships din ako. No commitments involved. For the simplest reason that they couldn't commit, because they were either committed to someone else, or that they weren't ready to commit.

My rationalization, "okay na iyun, kesa wala."

Ang habol ko lang naman, iyong kilig feeling. Iyong merong nagtatanong kung kumusta araw ko. Iyong merong ka-cuddle sa beach outing. Iyong kapag tumunog ang cellphone, mapapangiti na ako dahil alam kong galing sa kanya ang message. Iyong merong laging kasama. Habang wala pa ang the real thing, puwede na itong pagtiyagaan.

But then I learned that although it was only a pseudo-relationship, the emotions were real. And usually, in this kind of set up, ang babae lagi ang lugi.

Una, you can't ask him to commit. Since it's not really a relationship, you can't demand commitment from your partner. Ano ba kayo? May K ka nga ba magpasundo ng hatinggabi? You will always be uncertain about your role in his life. You can't expect him to be always there with you. And if you feel jealous of the other girls, you just have to keep it to yourself. Ano ka ba niya para magselos?

Pangalawa, what if you fall deeply in love with him? You can't be sure if he feels the same way. Baka nag-a-assume ka lang na mahal ka rin niya. Even if you are dying to tell him you love him, you can't. Because you're not sure if he'll like it. Baka mapahiya ka lang. This stage will always make you wonder where you are in the relationship. Or if there is a relationship at all.

Pangatlo, what if you become attached too much? What if you have invested all your emotions and this man hasn't? What if you remain faithful to him, not entertaining other guys, only to find out that he is seeing other girls?

Isa pang downside ng pseudo-relationships, it is fleeting. When a disagreement sets in, or when one of you gets cold, then that would be the end of it. Unlike in a serious relationship, hindi mo alam kung saan ka lulugar sa isang pseudo-relationship. Wala kang pinanghahawakan. Kasi sa pseudo-relationship, there is no "us." Meron lang "you and me," hindi "us."

Buti sana kung pseudo-pain din lang ang mararanasan mo. Kaso, hindi eh. Real pain. And usually, kahit tapos na ang pseudo-relationship, hindi mo maiwasan umasang one day, may karugtong pa rin iyun. And you will be miserable, hoping to bring back what you used to have, only to find out eventually that the guy is in another pseudo-relationship with somebody else.

Ang hirap, ano? You agreed to this kind of set up for fun and then you'd end up hurting yourself in the process.

Pero puwede naman maiwasan ang pain eh. Puwede naman na hindi mo muna isipin ang future and just enjoy the feeling, without thinking of the consequences.

But if you are certain that you are going to hurt yourself in the process,kailangan mo mamili. You can be happy and live the moment without worrying what would happen next. Or you can stop settling with pseudo-relationshipsand wait for the real thing.

When I was younger and in a pseudo-relationship with an unavailable guy, afriend told me, "Sige, kung ayaw mong magpapigil, bahala ka.Magpakasaya ka.Pero huwag kang iiyak-iyak pagkatapos, dahil tatadyakan kita."

Ang bottom line lang naman, kung magpapasaya sa iyo, gawin mo. Ihanda mo lang ang sarili mo sa consequence. Dahil ang "parang kayo pero hindi" stage ay bihirang nagiging totoo. Usually, hanggang doon lang siya… almost, but not quite.